


Wedding Crashers

by HuaFeiHua



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crack, Fluff, Multi, Romance, SnK Minibang 2016, There's a goat, Weddings, a lot of weird shit happens, and a lot of flowers, but it's not like popping or whatever, flower symbolism, i'll tag them when their time comes, perspective morphs from character to character, so technically third person omniscient, there are other ships but they're rather minor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-03
Updated: 2016-09-03
Packaged: 2018-08-12 18:13:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7944343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HuaFeiHua/pseuds/HuaFeiHua
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Weddings are weird. Like, really weird. You're standing up in front of a bunch of people, looking fancy and holding flowers, and being stared at. Anything could go wrong at any minute, but sometimes, that's just what makes life interesting.<br/>First two chapters are a submission to the SNK Mini-Bang 2016</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Got Goats?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's called wedding crashers for a reason; here's the wedding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> note as of 6/12/17 i've added the dates to the wedding chapter(s) (when i get back to this (soon))

_June 5th_

* * *

 

This was it. Her big day. Mikasa took a deep breath and looked in the mirror as her best female friend Sasha wove orchids into her updo. She hummed softly as she worked.

“You ready for this, girl?” Sasha absently asked her. Truth be told, swarms of butterflies were trapped in her stomach, but Mikasa serenely smiled, nodding. Sasha then gave the chair she was sitting in a good twirl, nearly sending her skirt flying.

Mikasa let out a small “eep!” as she rolled across the dressing room floor. Her bridesmaids all looked up, then laughed, with the exception of Annie, who caught the backing of the chair as it slid by her. Mikasa, however, flew right off and tumbled to the ground.

“Everything okay in there, ladies?” Hange’s muffled voice called through the door.

“Yeeess,” they chimed in unison as Mikasa groaned.

“Ceremony starts in fifteen minutes, and Lillian’s coming in there; Levi and Petra want good seats, but she can’t be with them,” Hange continued as the doorknob clicked open and a small girl with black hair laced into a fishtail braid and crowned with lilacs was pushed inside.

Mikasa straightened herself out, then checked her reflection to see if her makeup smeared. She then breathed a sigh of relief when everything, by some miracle, seemed untouched, even the flowers.

Her friend Historia twirled a makeup brush casually before putting it back into its case, snapping it shut. “Told you it wouldn’t get ruined,” she grinned.

“Har, har, har. Why aren’t you with Ymir?” Annie drawled, and Historia pointed at Mikasa.

“ _She_ didn’t want her as a bridesmaid.”

“Hey! It’s not my fault Eren only wanted three groomsmen. Besides, she has Reiner and Bertholt to keep her company during the ceremony.”

“Why did he even _choose_ Jean as a groomsman? Weren’t they super-duper competitive back when we were in college?” Sasha wondered aloud.

“Oh, _please_ , Potato Girl, it was him or that useless piece of muscle Reiner. Besides, you’re just glad he chose Connie as best man because _you_ have a crush on him, and the only reason Connie’s best man and not Armin is because Armin’s officiating the ceremony,” Annie shot back, rolling her eyes as she absentmindedly shuffled the flowers in her bouquet around.

Sasha’s cheeks turned pink. “Fight me,” she said in a low voice, and Annie dryly laughed.

“Armin’s practically best man anyway. Connie’s basically just a glorified groomsman, so ha,” she replied.

Mikasa suddenly felt someone tug at the hem of her dress, and she looked down at Lillian’s innocent face, grinning gap toothed up at her.

“Auntie Mika, do you like goats?” she asked in a sweet voice.

“Oh shit. We’re such a terrible influence,” Annie said in a low voice. Sasha covered Annie’s mouth the instant she finished.

“ _You fucking cussed in front of a five-year-old_ ,” she hissed, then clamped her own mouth shut with her free hand, eyes widening.

“I don’t give a flying fuck if you cuss in front of me. Daddy doesn’t give a shit anyways, so why should you?” Lillian told them in a matter-of-fact tone.

The girls all exchanged bewildered looks as the doorknob rattled again and Hange popped her head in.

“Wedding’s on in ten, girls! Take your places, and uh, I have a few more things for you before you enter the chapel,” she said.

A light giggle escaped Mikasa as she glanced at the mirror one last time before leaving the room with three of her best friends in the world.

The groomsmen were milling around in the foyer, surrounded by buckets of flowers and stacks and stacks of flower crowns. Mikasa felt her eyes go wide with amazement as she took everything in. “Hange, what is the meaning of all this?” she asked.

Sasha let out a low whistle. “It’s astounding that all the florists are even alive after all that,” she agreed.

“Don’t question it,” Marco called, daisies woven through his hair and tucked into his breast pocket.

Hange hurriedly put a crown of ivy and myrtle on Mikasa’s head, ignoring him. “I know you already have flowers in your hair, but I accidentally ordered a little too much, so I turned them into crowns and gave them out to the guests.” She then paused, then pulled out a thin, white, veil and pinned it to the base of her updo. “You forgot the veil,” she whispered, and Mikasa unconsciously felt her hand touch the back of her head, where she felt the thin piece of cloth hanging down.

Hange’s fingers then expertly wove peonies into Historia’s braid as she continued. “Only problem now is we’ve run out of guests and we _still_ have too many flowers.” She picked up a few sprigs of rue and added them to the fringe of Annie’s bun. Annie gently touched them, then adjusted her grip on her bouquet.

“Don’t even _ask_ where they all came from,” Hange lamented as she delicately laced Sasha’s ponytail with gardenias.

Jean leaned against the wall, daffodils falling out of his close-cropped hair. He sighed. “Hange, did you notice that Eric has gone missing?”

She looked up and around, mouth forming an O shape when she realized he was correct. “Eric!” she called. “Eric, where are you?”

A small, dark-haired boy with blue-green eyes ran into the foyer, lilacs entwined in his messy hair and pinned to his formalwear. He grinned up at the adults. “Here~” he sang, but Hange was having none of it. She pulled him forward by the forearm and knelt down so that they were eye level.

“I fucking swear, if you run off like that again, I will skin you alive and serve your testicles to your father,” she said dangerously, not even a spark of mirth visible in her eyes to ease his fear.

Mikasa glared at Hange from above for terrifying her young ring bearer. Hange smiled sweetly, then led Eric and Lillian to the chapel entrance and handed them their props: a basket of flowers for Eric, and a pillow with rings on it to Lillian.

“Uh, Hange, shouldn’t it be the other way around?” Connie asked, and Hange looked at her handiwork.

“Whoops!” she said, then looked down at the children. “Does it matter to you?” she inquired.

Eric made a face. “Roses are red, violets are blue. Flowers are for girls, so therefore fuck you,” he seemed to recite as Lillian silently nodded her head at her aunt.

Hange sighed and switched their props around. “Don’t let your mother catch you swearing like that,” she warned, but no one seemed to care. She checked her watch. “Seven minutes to go, guys. Historia, Marco, you next.”

The tiny girl looked up at her freckled counterpart. “Um, how are we going to link arms…?” she softly asked, and Marco looked slightly flustered as he offered her the crook of his arm. Hange didn’t seem to notice, so Historia gently clasped his arm and together they stood behind the fidgeting children.

Annie and Jean came next. The shorter girl glared balefully up at her partner before begrudgingly taking his arm.

“ _I have a boyfriend, so don’t get any ideas_ ,” she hissed at him, and he flinched. Though she was small, he knew from experience that she was an amazing fighter.

“Hangeee, can I tra-” he began, but he was harshly shushed. He felt a strong tug at his ear as he was dragged down slightly, and he felt Hange’s breath tickling the inside of his ear; it was gross.

“Jean, as gay as you are for Marco, you just can’t go off and switch like that. We vaguely rehearsed it this way, and this is how it is in the programs, _do not be selfish_ ,” she chided quietly. The taller boy flinched again, but did not fuss. He valued his testicles and did not wish for Hange to threaten to cut them off.

Sasha and Connie needed no prompting. They instantly linked arms and pretended to frolic through a meadow before settling in line behind everyone else. Sasha’s heart was giddy with excitement, and it showed. A shower of petals from an older rose fell to the floor as she bounced her corsage in her hands, and an ill-placed gardenia fell from its place. Connie discreetly slapped her arm, and she instantly calmed down.

Hange checked her watch one last time, and Mikasa wished she had a nice one to be wearing right now. She nervously fiddled with her flower arrangement, a mix of phlox, primroses, and viscaria, with sprigs of forget-me-nots and baby’s breath sprinkled throughout.

“It’s going to start, guys,” Hange whispered, and slipped through the doors, ready to open them when the ceremony were to truly start.

It seemed as though no time passed at all when the classical prelude faded away and was replaced by the opening chords to a cover of _Can’t Help Falling in Love._ Mikasa felt her heart rate speed up as the doors opened, and Eric and Lillian stepped out onto the aisle together.

They had enough sense to walk gracefully, though Lillian was generously showering petals everywhere, and Eric appeared to be trying to outwalk her. Mirth bubbled up inside as she watched them, and she decided those kids would make a cute couple someday.

“ _Wise men say, ‘only fools rush in,_ ’ ” the lyrics began, and Historia stepped out with Marco, following the beat much better than Lillian and Eric had been.

Historia scanned the crowd for her girlfriend Ymir, and smiled more naturally when she spotted her sitting with their friends Reiner and Bertholt. Marco trained his eyes to the end of the carpet, his hands becoming clammy as he was very aware of all the eyes on him and the significance of the event he was participating in. The pressure not to mess up was heavy on him, and he felt a rush of relief when the next cue came on, and the guests stopped staring at him and Historia.

“ _But I can’t help falling in love with you._

“ _Oh, shall I stay?_ ” the song continued, and Annie walked out with Jean, her sullen gaze boring into everyone, sending chills down their spines.

Her slight smile only made her seem more frightening, and everyone on her side of the chapel flinched away. However, the ice in her gaze melted away when she caught the eye of her boyfriend, Armin, up front with a pile of flowers tangled in his hair and ready to lead the ceremony. Jean, on the other hand (no pun intended), radiated pride and warmth right from the start, his bright and charming smile causing a few of the single ladies to swoon when he looked in their direction. They didn’t know he was gay _and_ European.

“ _Would it be a sin_

“ _If I can’t help falling in love with you._ ”

Sasha and Connie stepped onto the scene as the children parted ways at the end of the aisle and stood very still on the stage. Surprisingly, Lillian hadn’t run out of petals after the first three seconds of being a flower girl, though they became far scarcer towards the end. Sasha flashed a fake smile at everyone, her heart beating so fast in her chest that she was sure it was just a buzz at this point. Her nerves were on edge, and she could hardly focus on the event around her. It was by sheer willpower alone that her hands weren’t jittering all the flowers into nothing and her legs weren’t giving out beneath her. There were a thousand ways this could all go wrong, and they all simultaneously ran through her head as she walked down that aisle. Briefly, she wondered if someday she’d walk through this chapel in a white gown instead of a peach one.

Connie could sense the fright in his best friend and partner-in-crime as they walked down together. While his smile was more genuine, he couldn’t help but sympathize with her. He was naturally bold and brave, and being the center of attention pleased him, so he couldn’t relate to her anxiety. He was tempted to yank her in this direction, just to make her a little less stiff, but he feared she’d keel over from shock if he did that, so he settled for a gentle nudge to the side. Sasha almost lost her composure right then and there, but after she settled down, Connie could tell she was far calmer than before.

The two made their way to the stage, parting in front of the altar. The final verse began, and Mikasa adjusted her grip on her bouquet. She looked down at the end of the aisle, where Eren waited for her.

She vaguely heard the bleat of a goat as she took a step forward.

“ _Like a river flows, surely to the sea,_

“ _Darling so it goes; some things are meant to be._ ”

Mikasa felt her heart pounding; everyone was staring at her. Many of them smiled at her, with the exception of her cousin Levi, who sat poker-faced next to his wife, Petra, who smiled brightly at her. The smiles eased her slightly, but her heart leapt when she heard the cry of a goat again, more insistent this time. The crowd, especially the children, began murmuring among themselves, but they were quickly shushed by others.

“ _Take my hand. Take my whole life too._

“ _For I can’t help falling in love with you._ ”

Now more than three-quarters down, Mikasa could see her fiancé fidgeting more clearly. She almost laughed out loud; it made her so relieved that he felt almost as nervous as she did. She hardly even noticed the crowns of flowers on everyone’s head but his.

“For I can’t help falling in love with you.”

The final chords melted away, and Mikasa stood next to Eren in front of their lawyer friend Armin, who was officiating the ceremony. Neither one of them was particularly religious, so having a priest do it felt odd, so they’d asked Armin to marry them, since he was by far the most qualified.

Mikasa smiled at Eren as they faced each other and held hands as Armin held his law textbook open to a random page (to look official) and recited his opening lines.

“Friends, Romans, and countrymen: lend me your beers!” he joked, and a few adults chuckled.

Those participating in the ceremony had heard the terrible line many times during rehearsal, and it had lost most of its charm when they heard it, but Sasha smiled a little wider and rolled her eyes anyway as she leaned against the wall. She rather loved the relaxed atmosphere of this wedding. Many of the weddings she’d attended as a child required her to sit stock still in the pews, or stand up straight for an hour and a half of stuffy readings in an itchy dress, but this one was more up her alley. Armin joked constantly throughout his speech, the bridesmaids quietly made bets on who would get married next, sneezes were blessed and forgiven mid-sentence before being ignored, and children were allowed to walk about in the back as long as they were quiet.

“Seriously though, guys. Today’s the day that these two _idiots_ , Eren Jaeger and Mikasa Ackerman, are finally getting hitched, and that’s really worth celebrating,” Armin continued.

There was a sharp knock at the closed doors, and a muffled “baa.” Mikasa seriously hoped she was just imagining things, because they hadn’t drilled for “random goat arrival” during rehearsals, and she didn’t want to deal with something they weren’t prepared for.

“Now today isn’t about some ancient rhyme of the married, recited in a dead language. Being serious, ish, it’s about love. As I’m sure you can tell by their ogling, they’ve got the romantic love down, and they’re being total saps about it by getting married.”

Eren knew his best friend was making this speech up on the spot, save that first line, and he was damn good at it too. He’d never taken his friend as the joking type, but he was having a hard time biting back laughter as Armin’s simple speech continued.

“Getting married’s really weird if you think about it. I mean, you stand up here in front of a bunch of people, looking fancy and holding flowers, and being stared at. Anyone could mess up at any moment, and wow, that’d be a story to tell your kids. Like, ‘yeah, when I married your mom, she fell down before missing her cue, and ended up with a black eye as we spoke our vows.’ ”

Historia twitched slightly at Armin’s mention of messing up. It was kind of crazy how _close_ he was to unwittingly telling everyone about how Sasha almost gave Mikasa terrible rug burn before getting married. She faintly shook her head, and crossed one leg over the other as she leaned against Annie, bouquet held at an angle. The cold blonde sidestepped her, and Historia nearly fell down and made a fool of herself in front of everyone.

“Anyway, it’s because it’s not the mistakes that matter to them. What one doesn’t have, the other provides. I never understood the concept of ‘couples making one another complete,’ and even now, I don’t understand. They don’t _complete_ each other, as though that’s all there is to it, as though they cannot exist without the other; they bring out the best in each other, lifting the other to heights they couldn’t reach alone.”

Jean squirmed as he stood. Armin was taking a hell of a long time, and he hoped he was getting to the end of his ramble. He felt a soft tap on his shoulder, and turned to see a freckled boy with daisies in his hair making weird faces at him. Jean snorted, then relaxed.

“Today, we’re here to witness the joining of the lives of Eren Jaeger and Mikasa Ackerman. Out of the regular, everyday routine, the extraordinary happened, to say the least. They met each other, fell in love, and are finalizing it with their wedding day,” Armin finished, his face and voice transitioning into serious mode. “The bride and groom have written their own vows, and will now recite them.”

Mikasa looked at the other end of the aisle, and she noticed the double doors were slightly ajar. Suspicious, she eyed the side aisles, where she spotted a shaggy white goat sitting contentedly on the floor, chewing on flowers as a small child ruffled its fur. Mikasa took a deep breath, and called on the words she’d written a long time ago.

“The first time I saw you, I knew it was true; that I’d love you forever, and that’s what I’ll do. All that truly remains to tell, is that without you, I fell. I fell forever, cries for help ignored, and deep within me, my love for you poured,” she recited, her voice quivering with nerves.

The goat let out a loud “baa,” and stood up. The child that had been practically lying on it slid off and began whining as the goat began ambling around in the chapel.

Mikasa was very tempted to go out and kill that goat right then and there, but she’d agreed with Eren that no matter what happened as they got married, they’d just roll with it.

“Then out of the darkness, a hand reached out. It pulled me away, to a much better place.” Her voice cracked with emotion as she continued. “That place is with you, with no other doubt. You are my world, can never be replaced. I love you.” Mikasa whispered those last three words, then her voice grew stronger. “I love you from now ‘till forever. I am yours to have and to hold, to laugh with and grieve with, in sickness and in health, and to enjoy life’s simplest pleasures with, for as long as we both shall live.”

A wave of “awwww”s rippled through the crowd, and even the goat bleated loudly when she finished. Mikasa was beginning to become seriously annoyed with it, but it wasn’t doing any harm, so she had no reason to abuse it later.

Eren laughed nervously, and ran his hand through his hair. “I don’t have any poetry written out,” he admitted, then reached into his blazer pocket and began pulling out a worn red scarf and held it out in front of him. He saw Mikasa’s eyes widen as she recognized it as her trademark scarf, which she’d misplaced yesterday and couldn’t wear to the ceremony today.

“Once upon a dream, we were staring death in the face. Neither one of us thought we’d get out alive, and of all the things you could have done, you turned to me and _thanked_ me, for all the things I’ve done for you. For wrapping this scarf around you the day we met.”

Mikasa began to cry and her makeup ran down with her tears, but no one cared.

Eren draped the scarf over her shoulders as he continued. “Now we stand here today, getting married. I promised you then that I’d always be there to wrap this scarf around you, a thousand times if I had to.” He snorted slightly, giving Mikasa a crooked smile before starting to laugh harder. “I love you, too,” he said as he tied the scarf neatly around her neck.

“Oi, Eric, we need the rings,” Armin called, and the child jerked awake. He had a very short attention span and had dozed off into a daydream the moment Armin started talking. Be it luck or a miracle, he’d held the pillow on which the rings sat on straight enough so that they didn’t fall off, and he waddled over to the blond man and presented him with the rings. The instant they were taken from him, he wandered away.

Armin sighed. They’d told Eric several times that the rings were to be given directly to the couple, but some things just can’t get hammered into the heads of children no matter how hard anyone tried. He scooped up the rings and tossed the pillow behind the altar, shifting his textbook in his arms as he did so so that nothing important would fall. He began talking as the goat sauntered to the front and began to eat the flower arrangements that decorated the base of the stage.

“Rings are a sign of _infinity and beyond~_ All the way to space: the final frontier. They represent your spouse’s love and fidelity from now until forever. Remember that marriage is a two-way street when you look at these rings,” Armin said, and dropped the rings into the hands of the couple. He made a “go on,” gesture with his face, and Eren awkwardly cleared his throat.

“Erm…” he eloquently began, then took Mikasa’s left hand. “Take this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity, and with this ring, to thee I wed.” Having attended several weddings in his life, he called upon those sleepy memories as he was put on the spot as he slid the ring onto her finger.

Mikasa returned the gesture, repeating his lines back to him, word for word.

Armin grinned. “With the power vested in me by Isayama himself, (“not really, though,” he loudly whispered into the mic.) I declare this ship canon. You may kiss the… ohhh-kay I guess you’re already kissing.”

He was right. Almost as soon as Armin began speaking, Mikasa leaned forward and kissed her now-husband. The guests stood up and began cheering loudly, and even the goat looked up and bleated loudly above the cheers.

Eren felt the pressure of Mikasa’s lips on his, and he grinned inside and began reciprocating it. It was a simple, closed-mouth kiss that hardly lasted longer than a few seconds, but he loved it. His heart beat wildly, and he was filled with a giddy elation that was reminiscent of the first time they’d kissed. If he’d ever imagined he could fly, it would be at that moment when it was most likely.

Finally, they parted, their faces flushed, and smiles left on them that rivalled that of the Cheshire Cat. The newlyweds faced their audience, fingers laced together, and they took their first step down in sync. As they did so, Lillian rushed forward with her basket, and threw a fistful of leftover rose petals over the duo. Mikasa looked back in surprise, and upon seeing her cousin’s daughter, laughed aloud. Now ecstatic, she picked up the hem of her dress with her bouquet hand and began running towards the back with Eren in tow.

How she ran like that in her high heels was a mystery no one was ever able to fully explain forever afterwards, but Sasha tossed her corsage out into the crowd and began excitedly running after her best friend as Historia skipped over to Ymir, tackling her in a hug and crushing her flowers between them. Connie sprinted after Sasha, laughing aloud as Jean pulled the few remaining daffodils out of his hair with the help of Marco. Annie simply buried her nose in her arrangement and wandered over to Armin.

She leaned against his shoulder silently as they watched the wedding procession go wild with happiness and cheer. She lightly fingered an old ring she always wore, and smiled ever so slightly.

“They look really happy,” she commented.

Armin shifted his gaze down to his own girlfriend, and smiled fondly. “That’ll be us someday,” he promised, then slipped his arm into hers and began leading her down the aisle.

Slightly surprised, Annie let her flowers slip from her grasp and onto the floor. “Did you just…?” she murmured in a bewildered tone, releasing her arm from Armin’s and facing him. They stared at each other for a few moments.

Armin’s eyes sparkled with a strange air of mischief. He slipped his left hand into his coat pocket and took Annie’s with his right. He opened her hand, and entwined his fingers with hers, holding it up so that they could both look at it without staring down too much. “I’ll leave that for you to decide,” he said, releasing her hand.

Annie’s hand instinctively turned into a fist at her side, and she was shocked to feel something small and suspiciously ring-like at the center when she did so. She opened her fist back up, and a silver ring with a glittering diamond chip winked back up at her, leaving her at a loss for words.

“Let’s get to the reception,” her now-fiancé said, leading her once more down the deserted aisle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You might be wondering: WHO IS ERIC??? The answer is just an OC, really. WHO DOES HE BELONG TO?? ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯. Not important right now. But anyway!! This, as stated in the description and tags and like everywhere, is a submission to the SNK Mini-Bang 2016!! There is ART for this fic!!!
> 
> (i realize i should have done this foooorever and a day ago, but i'll link to my artists' art!! since the original posting of this fic, one has deactivated (nuuu ;__;), one has changed urls, but the third one is still up so WHEE. anyway since i plan on never changing urls or deactivating i'll link to my reblogs of them bc that's likely to be the most reliable. and if i do change my url i can update it here~~)  
> [[by tch-brat](http://a-piece-of-shipping-trash.tumblr.com/post/149944603871/tch-brat-heres-my-art-for)] [[original post](http://tch--brat.tumblr.com/post/149938196281/heres-my-art-for-a-piece-of-shipping-trashs)]  
> [[by foxesarelyfe](http://a-piece-of-shipping-trash.tumblr.com/post/150236304226/foxesarelyfe-here-are-my-arts-for-the)]  
> [[by levis-teacup-handle](http://a-piece-of-shipping-trash.tumblr.com/post/150029598156/levis-teacup-handle-so-this-is-gonna-be-the)] [[original post](https://levis-teacup-handle.tumblr.com/post/150026018372/so-this-is-gonna-be-the-first-post-ill-ever-make)]


	2. What is This Even

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> you know all those really weird tags? those are just for the wedding half ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ.

Eren and Mikasa hadn’t driven to their wedding on their own; they’d hitched rides with their friends so that there wouldn’t be a mess later on with two separate cars. Besides, carpooling was better for the environment. 

Now they were sitting in the back of Armin’s battered old car, riding to the reception, which was held at a nice (but not terribly expensive) hotel, specifically in the ballroom. It was abnormally small as well, but they were given access to the slightly larger garden outdoors, and they couldn’t pass that up; they were both huge outdoors enthusiasts.

Armin hummed softly along with his music as the newlyweds did whatever in the backseat. Annie looked somberly out the window from her shotgun seat, gingerly fiddling with her new engagement ring. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” he asked, and an odd sense of déjà vu* washed over him, but he shook it away.

Annie didn’t even look away. “I have enough pennies as it is,” she replied. Armin didn’t push her; he knew her well enough to let her sullen spells run their course. He spotted the hotel out of the corner of his eye and pulled over. 

There were a fair amount of cars already parked there, but that made sense. Eren and Mikasa had been dragged away after the receiving line to have their wedding photographs taken, and it was about an hour after the wedding itself had actually ended. Armin had stuck around because his friends needed a ride, and Annie stayed because she lent her car out to Sasha for the day and  _ she _ needed a ride.

Eren stepped out of the car, then picked up Mikasa, bridal-style. 

“Eren, you don’t have to do this; I can carry my hem off the ground,” she whispered as he began to carry her inside.

He laughed in response. “Don’t you know it’s bad luck to have a bride walk through a doorway on her own?” he asked her in a teasing voice. He wasn’t going to lie though, she  _ was _ heavy, and the ballroom wasn’t exactly a waltz away from the lobby. Hell, he wasn’t even in the lobby of the hotel yet, what was he thinking?

Annie looked over at Eren struggling to carry Mikasa, and “tch”ed quietly. “Too much pride in him,” she scoffed. She lifted her baleful gaze to the sky, where fluffy white cumulus clouds dominated the horizon. It was about half past twelve. Eren and Mikasa had a morning wedding, to save costs and have more time together to do…  _ married couple things _ later. Annie tried not to dwell on those thoughts.

Sasha pushed a piece of ice around on her salad plate with a fork. What kind of fork, she didn’t know, nor did she particularly care. As the ice melted and made the plate slick with water, Sasha’s patience wore thin and she heaved an exasperated sigh. 

“You okay, Sash?” Connie asked her, loudly chewing on his own ice.

She sighed again, and gracefully put her fork back where it had originally been. “Yeah, but it’s been almost an hour since we got to the reception. Sure, this is supposed to be ‘cocktail hour,’ where the couple goes out and gets pictures taken and all that mish-mash, but isn’t an hour a little  _ excessive _ ?” she asked him, staring down at her pretty much empty plate.

She then felt a slight tug on her sleeve and looked up, hearing cheers all around her. Connie pointed at the entryway to the ballroom. 

“Speak of the devil,” he whispered. 

There stood the newlyweds. Eren struggled beneath Mikasa’s hefty weight in his arms, and it showed on his face to a degree, but they were both smiling as they made their grand entrance. 

Armin and Annie quietly slipped in behind them, hoping to go unnoticed, but Sasha’s keen eye spotted everything, down to the new gleam on Annie’s left ring finger. She gave the girl a thumbs up and a wink when she passed by, and for once, Annie gave out one of her rare smiles.

Eren gently let Mikasa down the moment he passed through the doorway and stretched, muttering something no one caught. He then took his wife by the hand and led her to the center of the dance floor.

“That’s my cue, Sash. See ya soon,” Connie whispered as he got up to connect his phone to the speakers.

Sasha’s ears perked up as a piano played a melancholy downwards scale that turned into minor chords and violin music. A sad but beautiful voice began singing in Japanese, and the newlyweds began to dance.

Mikasa rather loved the song that was playing right now; she’d heard it a fair amount as a child. Though she had some knowledge of Japanese, courtesy of her mother, she understood none of the lyrics that were being sung at the moment, since she’d never asked her mother to translate the song for her.

As she danced with Eren, their faces turned somber, and they danced from the heart, making everything up on the spot and hoping the other would get what was happening. They stepped and twirled in perfect, enchanting harmony for a minute and a half before the final chord died away, leaving them holding hands and facing one another, once again at the heart of the ballroom. Their breathing was slightly heavier than usual from the exertion, and the entire party was dead silent except for that for a few moments after the song ended.

Historia began to clap, followed by her tablemates Ymir, Reiner, and Bertholt. The applause spread through the room like wildfire, leaving the couple standing bewildered in the midst of it all. 

A delicate smile graced Mikasa’s face as Eren’s jaw subtly slackened. Mikasa led them both in an elegant bow before dragging him to their seats next to their friends. She did not care for a special table, to be isolated from all the others with only Eren. Though she loved him, they both had other friends near and dear to their hearts that they would prefer to hang out with as they ate lunch.

It was self-serve, so they filled their plates and sat down across from Armin and Annie. The rest of the wedding squad was spread out around the room, so that the toasts wouldn’t seem like they’re all coming from the same place. 

The moment Armin saw Eren and Mikasa seat themselves, he got up and tapped his fork against his empty water glass to call everyone’s attention. The quiet chatter died down, and all eyes were on him.

“So, normally, the best man opens up the toasts. But I’m Eren’s best friend, I married these two, so screw Connie,” he began, and he got a few chuckles from the crowd, and he continued.

“I once read on Tumblr that ‘murder is a great couple bonding activity,’ and sometimes, I think these two took that a little too seriously. Okay, so maybe they didn’t  _ literally _ murder anyone, but I was there when they met, and I’m pretty sure something in them died the moment they laid eyes on each other. In fact, I specifically remember having to slap Eren, he short-circuited so much.” A bit more laughter here and there, though the places where it was wildest came from those who knew the couple best. Armin smiled. 

“Some of you may have never found out why Mikasa loves that red scarf of hers so much. In short, it was her first present from someone who loved her romantically. It was a chilly winter’s day, and she wasn’t used to the cold and hadn’t the proper clothes. Eren, being the gentleman he was, overcame his nerves and gave her his own scarf. Took it off his neck and just wrapped it messily around her head. That was probably the moment they fell in love.

“Normally, I’m pretty sure I’m supposed to say, ‘I think Eren’s going to miss bachelor life.’ But, this definitely isn’t a normal case. I wish the newlyweds the best on their new journey! To Eren and Mikasa!” Armin held up his empty glass and gave out an extravagant bow, then sat down again. The crowd mirrored his gesture and his words.

The next course came along, and halfway through, Connie stood up with Sasha, both of them tinkling their glasses with forks in unison.

“Hey, hey, hey. I’m Connie,” he began.

“I’m Sasha,” Sasha chimed in.

“And we are so honored to be at this wedding as best man and maid of honor.”

“I first met Mikasa back in middle school. I begged her for bread, I was so hungry. Of course she said no, but we eventually went on to become best of friends, and I know we just said this, but I am still completely honored to be standing here as her maid of honor,” Sasha gushed. 

“I didn’t meet anyone in here until I was a junior in high school, but man am I glad we did meet. I remember first meeting Eren in in trig class, and learning he had a girlfriend. At first, I was like, ‘okay, cool,’ but then I saw them together, and I was so confused,” Connie said.

“I once heard someone say, ‘anyone can be passionate, but it takes real love to be silly,’ and right now I can’t think of any better couple who fits that bill,” Sasha quoted for him.

“Back in the old days of high school, you kind of assume that dating is all about a lovey-dovey mess making out in the hallways as you’re trying to get to class. But they were very different. They joked and laughed, never asking for much. Instead of going out all the time, they simply enjoyed each other’s company, content to just be together in silence.”

“Eren and Mikasa frankly have one of the healthiest relationships we’ve ever seen, and we wish them all the best in the future.” Sasha blinked. “Wow, I told one short story, but whatever.” She lifted her glass, and Connie mirrored her action.

“To the newlyweds!” the cried in unison, clinking their water glasses together, then taking a sip and sitting down. The crowd applauded wildly, and their words were echoed.

Dinner was almost over when Jean was pushed forward by Marco, who rang out for attention on his glass.

“You’ll thank me later,” he whispered as he pulled his friend up to make a toast.

Jean ran his hand through his hair, and everyone stared at him. “Um, hi, I guess. I’m Jean, and my friend Marco here has convinced me to make an on-the-spot toast,” he said. He made eye contact with no one, but projected his voice so that he wouldn’t seem more embarrassed than he already was.

“Uh, before I get started, I’d just like to say I’m extremely flattered I was even invited to this wedding, let alone chosen as a groomsman. I didn’t hit it off with either Eren or Mikasa when we first met. I met Eren and we almost immediately got into a fistfight before Mikasa had to pull us apart. Needless to say, it was a rocky start. But as time went on, they changed me from a terrible jerk into someone more chivalrous by introducing me to Marco here. And uhm… they helped me start over, with a new beginning. The fight was forgiven and forgotten, and I changed.” Jean eased up a little, looking at the newlyweds. 

“Now that I think about it, if it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t be where I am now. Truth be told, I’d probably be in jail or something. These are words I never thought I’d ever say, but,” he continued, then suddenly grinned, and lifted his glass to the ceiling. “To a new life!”

Everyone had been slightly confused up to that point, but they got past it and cheered loudly for the last toast of the night, the few drunken echoes drowned out by applause. Marco smiled at Jean as he sat down, then waited for everyone to stop noticing them.

The moment they did, the freckled boy felt his heart start pounding in his chest as he quickly leaned over and planted a quick kiss on Jean’s cheek. He saw his partner’s cheeks go all red as he turned away, embarrassed as well.

Annie quietly observed the hullabaloo all around her. Parties weren’t really to her taste, but Mikasa was one of the only friends she had, and she wanted to show her support. She took a sip of wine, then nearly spat it right back out again as she was reminded why she hated the taste of alcohol. She sighed, wanting to get away from all the people that were draining her. Realizing no one was stopping her, she tapped Armin on his shoulder and mouthed,  _ I’m going outside _ . 

Historia dragged Ymir out onto the dance floor soon after lunch was over.  _ Stand by You  _ was playing, and it had always reminded her of them. She knew Ymir’s dark side better than anyone else, but it had never changed their relationship at all. As she swayed gently with her frankly somewhat unhygienic girlfriend, she smiled brightly up at her. “Don’t you love this song?”

“ _ Won’t let nobody hurt you _ ,” Ymir sang badly back at her, then cracked a smile. “Yeah, I do. Marry me when all this is over?”

Historia laughed. “Ymir, you say that every other day. You know I’ll always say yes.”

Sasha leaned her elbow on Connie’s shoulder and looked at Jean and Marco. “Nice that they actually kissed for once.”

Connie nodded. “You could just  _ feel _ the gay radiating out of Jean at times.”

Sasha suddenly snorted. “I think he was going to pass out when Marco pecked his cheek.” She then got up and tugged on Connie’s arm. “Let’s dance.”

Annie sat on a bench near a small duck pond and crumbled up some leftover garlic bread for them. She vaguely remembered reading something on Tumblr that said not to feed ducks bread, but she didn’t really care. When she ran out of bread, she glanced up at the sky. It had been sunny outside when she, Armin, Eren, and Mikasa had first arrived, but now the sky was a pale grey color. Not that she minded; Annie loved the somber feelings she got when it rained outside, but the change in weather was so fast that it was a little concerning.

With a sigh, she got up to leave, but an exceptionally large goose waddled up to her and honked.

She scowled at it, but began to leave. It followed her. 

“Get  _ away _ from me,” she hissed at it, poking at it with her toes.

It bit her on the leg and hung on for dear life.

Annie frowned and kicked her leg rigorously, trying to remove the bird now attached to it. The goose flapped its wings wildly but clung to her anyway.

It was starting to piss Annie off. “Get  _ off _ of me,” she snarled, hopping back towards the interior in her heels. Which was probably a very bad choice, since she soon half stepped on the edge of a very smooth rock and started falling down, bird in tow.

She shrieked, crashing into a large window. It didn’t shatter, Annie was too light for that, but her head did get an exceptionally hard knock. The pain had barely registered when her knees buckled beneath her and black spots danced in front of her eyes.

Historia was closest when she heard the sudden, loud thud over near the outside. She stopped speaking mid-sentence and whipped around with terrified eyes to see Annie briefly stumble forward, a demonic-looking goose clamped onto her leg, before collapsing to her knees. At first, she was relieved that no one had died; there wasn’t a drop of blood in sight nor a scratch visible on Annie.

Still very worried about her blonde friend, Historia put down her wine glass and slipped out of her seat only to get her arm caught by Ymir.

“Where’re  _ you _ going,” her girlfriend half slurred, half giggled. 

Many of the guests had already turned their full attention to Annie, who now was stirring and getting up on her own. A few of them had already gone outside to check on her, and Armin was already at her side, getting rid of the goose and helping her get back to her feet.

Historia gently pushed Ymir off of her. “I’m going to go help Annie,” she replied in a kind voice. “Now don’t drink too much, Ymir. I don’t want to have to go home early because you’re barfing in the bathroom for ten minute straight from alcohol poisoning.”

Ymir pulled her tiny girlfriend into a hug and planted a sloppy kiss on her little blonde head. “As you wish, my darling,” she mumbled before releasing her.

Mikasa’s mind was spinning; what had just happened? One moment everything seemed like it was  _ finally _ going as planned, then there was a shatter and a  _ really loud honk _ , then a  _ thump _ , and next thing she knew, Annie was half-collapsed on the ground with a goose and Armin was sprinting for the door. 

Fortunately, Annie was just fine, a little confused and  _ very _ jarred, but at the end of the day, she wasn’t hurt. She tottered back to her seat with minimal help, and in a matter of minutes, the situation had calmed down. However, on her return, she refused to talk to anyone and simply pushed a piece of ice around on a clean plate with her fork.

Meanwhile, Connie returned to his seat after getting up to see what had just happened as Sasha ate heartily next to him.

She swallowed a mouthful of noodles. “Hey Connie, what’s on next?”

“Uhhh, let me check,” Connie replied, pulling out his ipod out of his blazer pocket and thumbing through the playlist. “ _ A Song for Erika _ , I think. Why do you ask?

“I think these people could use something  _ weird _ to lighten the mood,” Sasha answered with a mischievous grin. “Is  _ Never Gonna Give You Up _ on that playlist?”

_ Oh, I see where this is going _ , Connie thought and returned the impish grin. “ _ Maaaybe _ ,” he said. “Maaaybe. Do you want it to be?”

Sasha grinned even more. “ _ Do it _ , Connie. Do it.”

Connie almost couldn’t bite back his laughter as he put the song on.

Jean was chatting with Ymir and Marco when he heard it. That distinct drumroll and piano playing and then–

“ _ We’re no strangers to looove _ .”

He glanced over at Connie and Sasha, the need to facepalm growing in him when he saw them snickering. Everyone at the reception was dead silent, just allowing the Rick Astley song to sink in.

Then suddenly– laughter. Actual  _ laughter _ . Ymir was cackling from right next to him. Historia’s light giggles soon joined in, and as the absurdity of the situation sank in, the other guests began to join them.

Jean glanced at Marco, who looked quite amused at the very least. He must have still looked very annoyed, because Marco said, “Lighten up, Jean. A Rickroll is  _ far _ from the strangest thing that’s happened at this wedding so far.”

Jean allowed himself to laugh.

Petra felt a slight tug at her sleeve. She looked down to see her young daughter gazing up at her. 

“Momma, can I sit on your lap? Daddy says he’s tired, but I know that’s bullshit, because I saw him straightening out  _ all _ the tablecloths. On  _ both sides _ ,” Lillian whined, reaching her little arms up at Petra.

“Don’t say bad words, Lillian,” Petra chided as she pulled her daughter onto her lap.

“Daddy says them!”

“Well, daddy shouldn’t be saying them either,” Petra briskly replied, side-eying Levi while making a mental note to reprimand him later for using foul language in front of little kids.

Lillian was content to simply sit on her mother’s lap for a few minutes, entertained by the simple pleasure of plucking petals off each flower of the centerpieces one by one.

“Momma, where do babies come from? Why don’t Auntie Mikasa and Uncle Eren have one yet? They just got married. Don’t people get babies at their weddings?” she asked when she grew bored of the flowers.

Petra blushed bright red.  _ Oh no _ . She couldn’t do this, not yet. She had to pawn this duty off on someone else.

From the corner of her eye, Petra spotted her savior. “I’m not too sure about the process, Lillian. Why don’t you ask your Auntie Hange? She knows  _ everything _ ,” Petra sweetly suggested, sliding Lillian off her lap.

Lillian blinked up at her mother, then glanced over at her aunt, who was holding a glass of what looked like, to her, apple juice and was being led around by one semi-panicky Moblit. She slowly blinked again.

“Okay,” she curtly said, then ran off towards her aunt.

Hange felt a tug on one of her pants legs. When she saw the face of her friends’ daughter, her face slowly split into a grin and picked her up.

“ _ Lillian _ ,” she slurred, offhandedly handing her drink off to Moblit.

“You’re talking funny,” Lillian giggled, then stroked the side of Hange’s face.

“Mm yes, alcohol does that to ya, kiddo,” Hange slowly replied before planting a sloppy, wet kiss on her niece’s forehead. “Don’t drink alcohol, Lily. It’s  _ bad _ for ya.”

Lillian pet her aunt’s nose. “Where do babies come from?” she innocently asked.

It took a few moments for the question to register in Hange’s mind. “ _ Babies _ , eh?” Hange cracked a lopsided grin and began to stagger to the nearest seat, only to smack face-first into Moblit, who sighed and guided her to a chair before bolting for the door. 

“ _ Wheeeere _ do babies come from?” she repeated, probably louder than she intended. Many of the nearby people gave her odd looks. In the background, Petra was covering her face with her hands and whispering, “Oh, for fuck’s sake.”

Armin glanced behind him just in time to see the maniacal gleam appear in Hange’s already wild eyes.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Hange’s drunk and Lillian’s gone and asked her where babies come from; we’re all doomed!” he sighed.

“Whose turn is it to stop her  _ this _ time?” Mikasa flatly asked. Fortunately for them, drunk Hange took a  _ very _ long time to think, otherwise this conversation wouldn’t have been happening.

“Mine,” Eren and Annie sighed in unison and both began to get up.

“It’s my turn,” Eren insisted, but Annie shook her head and subtly motioned to his wife (who saw said gesture, but for the sake of convenience, pretended not to.). Eren took the hint. He sat back down and said, “You’re right. I went last time. Have fun, Annie.”

“Where’s Moblit when you need him?” Annie quietly lamented as she pushed in her chair and hurried off to the drunken Hange.

“ _ WELL _ , Lillian, you see, babies happen when a mom and a dad–”

“Mail a letter to a stork, who leaves them a magic bean, then the mom swallows the bean to get pregnant with a baby for nine months before it comes out  _ the end _ ,” Annie hurriedly interrupted, scooping Lillian up and off of Hange’s lap before gently placing her back on the ground.

“ _ Really??? _ ” Lillian squealed, bouncing on her toes.

“Really,” Annie confirmed, attempting to pull Hange to her feet as she did so. “Now if you’ll excuse us, Auntie Hange’s feeling a little sick, so go pester uncle Connie or some shit like that.”

Lillian, still grinning, nodded and scampered off as Annie guided the older woman out into the foyer, then over to the bathrooms.

“Hange. You’re drunk,” she bluntly stated, “Do you need to vomit or something? Because if so, do it here; that’s what toilets are for.”

Hange, on the other hand, was fixated on something outside. Annie couldn’t tell what it was; the window was very small and far too high for her to see through.

“The sky is crying,” Hange simply stated, her already slack expression softening.

“Crying?” Annie echoed in a confused tone.

Hange pressed her nose against the glass.

“Hange,  _ please _ don’t do that, it’s gr–” Annie disgustedly began, but Hange wasn’t listening.

“Clouds as black as the night, strikes of sheer bright light,” she mumbled rather poetically.

A flash of light reflected on the bathroom’s tiled walls, and the blonde’s normally sleepy-looking eyes were blown wide in realization. “Oh.  _ Shit _ ,” she cursed, but a rumble of thunder made it so that no one heard.

Sasha nearly jumped out of her chair when she heard the thunder. The loud noise had caught her off-guard and her mind scrambled to straighten itself out. She blinked a few times before glancing out the window, where dark grey clouds loomed ominously on the horizon. A flash of lightning lit up the sky some ways away, and a soft rumble of thunder could be heard several seconds away.

“It’s going to rain soon,” she dumbly said aloud, though not too sure why it was a bad thing. She tore her gaze away from the sky and back to Connie. “Let’s go outside,” she simply said, having the strangest yearning to be outside with the weather.

Connie gave her a skeptical look and flicked his eyes to the outdoor half of the venue and back to Sasha several times. “Sasha, it’s going to rain soon.”

Sasha looked a tad heartbroken. “But I  _ like _ the rain. C’mon, Connie, let’s just enjoy the weather.”

“Mmkay then, Sasha, but don’t blame  _ me _ when you catch a cold and you have to stay at  _ my _ apartment for a pile of blankets and chicken noodle soup.”

“Ha! I have the immune system of  _ Sparta _ ;  _ what _ are  _ you _ talking about!”

Connie rolled his eyes. “Of course, Sasha, what would I, your go-to sick caretaker, know about the strength of your immune system?”

Sasha poked her tongue out at him in reply. “I’m not sure, Connie, it’s been so long that you must’ve forgotten.”

They both laughed as they stepped out the door before getting hit by a strong gust of wind. Sasha instinctively put up an arm to shield her face and Connie took a step backward in order to balance himself, but the air soon stilled.

“That was scary,” Sasha breathlessly whispered.

“Yeah, it almost tugged my tie right off,” Connie agreed.

Sasha gave him a quizzical look. “Why would your tie come off with the wind? Unless…” she gasped, dramatically leaning forward. “Is that…? Enhance!” She leaned closer to his chest, making Connie feel a little awkward. 

“What I think… Enhance!” She leaned even closer. She had nearly pressed her forehead to his chest just  _ staring _ at his tie. “It is???  _ Third _ unnecessary enhancement!!”

Connie could feel her resting a lot of her weight on his chest and he had to hold in laughter.

Sasha suddenly flew backwards, dramatically gasping as she did so. “ _ A CLIP-ON TIE???? _ ” she mock demanded.

“Uhh,” Connie said, pretending to adjust his tie.

Sasha grabbed the end of his tie and yanked on it, and as expected, it came right off with a  _ snap _ . She raised an eyebrow at Connie and held up his pitiful excuse for a tie.

“Really Connie?” she asked, sounding more amused than anything, “A clip-on tie? This is a  _ formal _ event; couldn’t you,  _ at the very least _ , GOOGLE ‘how to tie a tie?’ ”

“Well, they  _ did _ say  _ semi _ -formal dress on the invitations.”

Sasha snorted and rolled her eyes. “You know what happens to people who can’t tie ties.”

Connie rolled his eyes right back at her. “They go to the shame corner,” he recited.

“Yes they do,” Sasha chided, letting the tie fly away in a particularly strong gust of wind. She held her skirt down to prevent the wind from pulling it up. “No panty shots for you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You know how in fanservice animes they have really weird and totally unnecessary angles just so that you can look up a girl’s skirt at her panties?”

“You mean like  _ Sword Art Online _ ?”

“Yes, like  _ that _ piece of shit. Considering all this wind blowing around, there’d be a very good chance you’d see my panties, and you’re not ready for that yet.”

The wind picked up and a few light drops of rain fell from the ominous blackening clouds, reminding the two why they were there in the first place.

“It’s drizzling now. Do ya wanna hang outside a little while longer, or nah?”

“Do you think anyone’s noticed we’re out in the weather?”

“Probably not; it’s only been a couple minutes. They might notice that your tie is gone, but that’s a good thing.”

“Har, har.”

When informed of the rain via Annie, Eren and Mikasa agreed that there was nothing wrong with a few drops of water falling from the sky.

“Besides,” Eren pointed out, “What could possibly go wrong? We all agreed to go with the flow, so we’ll just cross that bridge when we get there.”

“Are you saying you’re just too lazy to deal with this right now?” Armin asked.

“It’s  _ my _ wedding; I’m going to want some crazy memories to go with the conventional. After all, since when was  _ I _ ever the one to go with the general populace?”

“I mean, you could just get drunk if you want surreal memories, but I can see your point. You  _ will _ be driving later, and I’m pretty sure that you’re not going to want to die less than twenty-four hours into marriage.”

“Exactly. I’ve got a wife to live and a life to– wait. Uhh, a  _ life _ to live and a  _ wife _ to, uh, something, I can’t rhyme right now,” Eren rambled as he pushed up his sleeve to check the time, and upon only finding a  _ very _ bad watch tan, remembered his watch was out for repairs and his cell phone was left at home. “Hey Mikasa, what time is it?”

His wife looked up from her conversation with one of the guests and raised an eyebrow at him. “Does this dress  _ look _ like it comes with pockets?” she asked.

“Crap, you’re right. Curse the women’s fashion industry and their lack of proper pockets. Armin, what’s the time?”

Armin checked his own watch. “It’s around two-thirty; shouldn’t you be cutting the cake soon? We’ve been here for a couple hours now.”

“You’re right,” Eren decided, then got up to track down one of the venue workers.

Marco abruptly paused from his conversation with Jean and scanned the room, suddenly feeling a little suspicious. He noted Connie and Sasha were nowhere in the vicinity, and very slowly, Marco turned back around to face Jean, who was giving him a funny look.

“Something wrong, Marco?” he asked, a genuine look of concern on his face.

“Do you ever get this really weird feeling that sometime  _ very, very soon,  _ something  _ very, very  _ **_weird_ ** is going to go down? Like, you have no idea  _ what _ specifically, just…  _ something _ .”

Jean cracked an amused smile. “Oh? Maybe your freckles are telling you something,” he teased, giving Marco a friendly poke to the cheek as he did so.

“Nice to know that this  _ MAGICAL FRECKLES _ thing is  _ ALL-INCLUSIVE _ , eh?  _ AMIRITE _ , Jeaaaannieee?” Ymir drunkenly butt in.

“Don’t listen to her, she’s  _ drunk _ ,” Historia chimed in, looking a tad tipsy herself as she precariously held a glass of wine with a mere two fingers.

“You’re  _ both _ drunk,” Jean dryly commented. “Do you two need a ride home?”

Ymir was about to loudly reply that  _ no _ , she and her lover did  _ NOT _ need a ride home, but Marco held up a hand and silenced them. He nervously glanced around the room again. He noted that a cake was coming in and that Connie and Sasha were still nowhere in sight.

“Guys,” he began in a low voice.

“Not sure where Connie is, but I’m glad his ipod password is so simple because otherwise we wouldn’t be able to turn down the music for this,” Eren’s voice interrupted through the speakers. “Uh, as you can tell, we’re having cake now. Whoo~”

The crowd politely applauded.

“And, uh,” Eren’s mind was drawing a blank at the moment. The cake was part of Sasha’s job; she was the one who was supposed to announce it, but she was nowhere in sight. “It’ll be cut by my lovely knife, uh,  _ wife _ with the lovely  _ knife _ over there,” he said out of panic, and motioned to Mikasa, who held up a frankly rather  _ dangerous _ looking knife with a somewhat unsettling grin.

“And so now, without further ado…”

Eren put down the mic and he and his wife held the knife together.

Marco’s intuition spiked the second the couple put the knife to the cake. If his suspicions were correct, then…

**_BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!_ **

There was a  _ monstrous _ crack of thunder, followed by Connie and Sasha  _ sprinting _ back inside, dripping wet. A kid started crying and everyone’s head snapped towards the window, where torrential rain was absolutely  _ pouring _ out of nearly jet-black clouds. The lights flickered out.

It was partway magical, partway terrifying. From the dark room peering out, the sheer amount of water just falling from the sky mesmerized many of the guests, though the two that had just come back inside didn’t seem too appreciative, since they seemed rather drenched.

As Sasha went to the bathroom to shake out her hair, the couple resumed the cake cutting in the dark. Marco continued to stare out the window at the rain, his eyes gradually adjusting to the dark. 

There was another flash of lightning in the distance and soon, another low rumble of thunder. He found it all very calming.

He had just received his slice of cake when he saw the dark outline of something quite unlike rain fall from the sky. Then another, and another, and another.

The figures outside began to croak, just one or two at first, then as more were dropped rather unceremoniously from the sky, it became a chorus of ribbiting frogs.

“It’s raining frogs,” Marco said in awe. “Could this wedding get any weirder?”

“I dunno man, I think it’s really gross, especially at a wedding,” Jean commented, delicately eating a bite of cake.

Ymir exaggeratedly gasped in the background. “ _ Frogs are a sign of healing, cleansing, and rebirth _ . It’s the  _ perfect _ symbol for a wedding, and combined with the good luck and renewal of rain, it’s the  _ perfect _ good omen from a witching perspective,” she refuted.

Jean looked at Historia. “Is Ymir secretly a witch, or this just one of her drunken antics?”

Historia blinked slowly, then after a very long pause, shrugged and said nothing.

Eren and Mikasa exchanged glances when the chorus of frogs outside became impossible to ignore. At this point, they had become so numb to all the bizarre things happening at their wedding that they found it to be just a minor inconvenience. Besides, they frogs weren’t coming in, so what was the harm?

“Where’s Hange?” Mikasa asked.

“I think she’s still in the bathroom,” Annie chimed in. “At least, that’s where she was when I last saw her. That was before the cake, though; I’m not sure where she is now and I haven’t seen her come back.”

“Should we be worried?” Mikasa asked her husband.

Eren took a sip of water and thoughtfully chewed on the ice. “Naaah. But we should probably wrap up the reception soon anyway. After all, I think there’s only so much insanity everyone can take.”

“Agreed. Bouquet toss?”

Eren wolfed down the rest of his cake, much to his bride’s amusement and dismay.

“You’ll choke,” she cried, but he kept eating anyway.

“Bouquet toss,” he agreed after hurriedly swallowing his cake. “But can we get someone else to do the announcement? Turns out I’m rubbish at this sort of thing.”

“Sasha’s drying off in the bathroom, but I guess Connie and I could do it,” Armin suggested.

“Brilliant. Let’s go, Mika,” Eren said, deciding to pick his wife up.

“I need a bouquet,” she said, then snatched up a random centerpiece, deciding it would work well enough. “Why are you carrying me, though?”

“Just go along with it, Mikasa. Goodness knows you’re lucky your partner can even lift you off the ground,” Annie told her, following the pair to participate in the toss, though she wasn’t particularly excited.

The music quieted down as did the guests and Connie tapped the microphone. It let out an inhuman screech and everyone covered their ears.

“...Never doing  _ that _ again,” Connie said, “But anyway,  _ laaaaaadieeeeeeeeeessssssssss _ , it is time for the bouquet toss. So if you’re not married and/or respond to the word ‘egg’, just head on over to the dance floor, and for nineteen dollars and ninety-nine cents,  _ you _ may be able to  _ catch a bouquet that will let you get married _ !”

“ _ Cooonnie _ ,” Armin warned.

“Right. The bouquet toss is free and eggs are not allowed to participate. Sorry, eggs.

“In three… two… one…”

Mikasa closed her eyes and threw the bouquet behind her at the crowd of women and girls.

Sasha watched as the bouquet soared gracefully through the air in a perfect arc, falling, falling, falling closer to her. Not daring to believe her luck, she outstretched her arms to catch the bundle of flowers.

“What,” Hange said in confusion as she stepped in front of Sasha and at the same time, got pelted by the bouquet. As she blinked in confusion, Sasha internally screamed as the flowers flew right over Annie’s short head and into her arms. 

The girls around Annie crowded her, chattering on and on as well as very  _ loudly _ , congratulating the small, shy blonde to the point where it was overwhelming, and Sasha’s jealousy faded away and was replaced by sympathy when she saw Annie’s panicking face before the smaller girl backed out of the crowd.

Everyone dispersed after the bouquet toss. Many of the guests invited out of obligation paid their farewells and left, leaving just the friends of the couple behind.

A few of those remaining pushed two tables together and finally sat back to process all that had happened during the wedding and reception. True, it had been spread out over the course of three hours, if the cocktail hour was omitted, but they still hadn’t had the opportunity to just sit down and fully  _ realize _ all the insanity of the event. 

“That was… quite the event,” Armin finally found himself saying and his friends murmured their agreement.

“I don’t think there’s ever been anything quite like it,” Jean commented.

“Nor do  _ I _ think there’ll ever be anything like it ever again,” Eren agreed.

A little off to the side and out of everyone’s range of vision, Connie and Sasha subtly exchanged identical grins.

“It’s pretty empty in the venue without all those guests,” Annie quietly said, playing with the petals of her bouquet’s flowers.

“How ‘bout one last dance then see off the newlyweds?” Connie suggested, grabbing his ipod and scrolling through the songs.

Eren stretched, then rested his arm over Mikasa’s shoulders, just the way they did it in the movies. “It’s been a  _ looong _ day. May I have this dance, madam?” he asked his wife, a giddy grin on his face.

“You may, my dear sir,” Mikasa giggled in reply, then got up and curtseyed at him.

Connie tapped on a song, and the speakers began to play one last song as the couple walked to the center of the dance floor together.

It started softly, just a few chords on the piano. Then it grew stronger, more confident as Eren and Mikasa began to waltz.

“ _ Heart. Beats. Fast. Colors and promises. _

“ _ How to be brave? How can I love when I’m afraid to fall? _ ”

“May I have this dance?” Armin quietly asked his fiancée, offering her his hand.

Annie gave him one of her rare smiles. She put the bouquet down and took his hand. “You may.”

Connie put down his ipod as almost everyone left paired off and began to slowly dance together. 

“I don’t think this wedding turned out so bad,” Sasha said aloud as she and Connie contently watched the couples dance. It looked quite like one of those balls of old, with the most powerful couple dancing together in the center and looking at each other like the rest of the world didn’t matter and all the others dancing in circles around them.

“Yeah. And frankly, I can’t wait to see how their wedding album turned out next time we visit them,” Connie agreed.

“ _ I have died every day waiting for you.  _

“ _ Darling, don’t be afraid, I have loved you for a thousand years. I’ll love you for a  thousand more. _ ”

Sasha’s heart melted as the song entered the bridge and Eren and Mikasa were getting closer and closer, staring at each other like they were each other’s entire universe. She gave a contented sigh, her shipper’s heart filled to the brim with happiness.

“ _ I have loved you for a thousand years. _ ”

Mikasa’s eyes slowly fluttered close. Sasha, in the background, audibly gasped and squealed.

“ _ I’ll love you for a thousand more _ .”

The moment the two kissed was undeniably magical; even those who weren’t watching could feel the shift in atmosphere.

“ _ One step closer… _ ” the speakers softly played, before fading out. Connie quickly pressed pause on his player as the dancers dispersed.

“Goodbye, guys,” Mikasa said, her eyes watering with emotion as she and Eren began to leave. “It’s been one hell of a day.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm too lazy to capitalize my notes on ao3 wtf. on ff i'm just like MY GRAMMAR MUST BE PRISTINE AND PERFECT SO THAT MY READERS CAN PICK IT UP THROUGH OSMOSIS and here i'm just like what's a shift key. also i think i'm more of a melted puddle of fandom and excitement here.  
> anyway. THERE WILL BE MORE OF THIS!! yes. there will be more weddings of weirdness. aruani's up next. yay. don't expect it too soon. i started this fic in april then lost all motivation for about four months then spent several school nights up until 12 working on it to meet a deadline that ended up being extended anyway. i love suffering ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ.  
> but anyway, yeah! there will be moar of this. and none of the concepts will be reused. stay tuned for that. whenever it might come out. on a side note, the friend who gave me this pitch is evilly cackling in the corner because she's really excited for the finale.  
> anyway, thank y'all for reading! it makes me happy. //please leave comments. if it's not a bother. and as always, have a greaat daaaay~


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